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Dui Lawyers Attorneys Lawyers – Did You Hear The One About

By: Richard Hall
Legal Attorneys

• Three partners of a law firm were flying out of town to attend a convention. Halfway through the trip, one of the partners said to the second partner, “Oh no, I forgot to lock the office safe”. The third partner quickly responded, “Don’t worry all three of us are here”.

• Question – “What’s wrong with telling a lawyer joke”? Answer – “Lawyers don’t think they’re funny and no one else thinks they’re jokes”.

• Question – “What do honest attorneys and UFOs have in common”? Answer – “You always heat about them but no one has ever seen one”.

Chances are you have heard numerous jokes pertaining to attorneys, and admittedly some are actually funny! However, while some can be taken lightly, others are almost gruesome. The love/hate relationship between attorneys and clients has been going on for a long time. Unfortunately, some attorneys probably deserve to have a joke written about them but most are good, honest, and reputable people trying hard to make a difference in a person’s life and society.

Although there are a number of negative perceptions associated with attorneys, the one that seems to keep hanging on is actually slightly misguided. Much of the public believes that all attorneys squeeze clients dry, charging them for every dime spent, often associated with outlandish lawsuits. Believe it or not there are industry standards and state bar guidelines as to how attorneys charge clients and are paid. The best way to avoid billing surprises is to agree in advance on how and what you are charged for and the expected timelines and outcomes.

The media has played a huge role in our overall perception of lawyers from news reports involving attorneys to attorneys (fictional and reality). If you were to turn on any major news channel, the majority of issues being reported whether they involve attorneys or not are often negative. We don’t hear news stories about attorneys doing their job, but we do hear of the isolated case of bad behavior. Therefore, the public assumes that one story pertaining to a crooked attorney represents all attorneys, which is simply not the case.

We also have the perception that many attorneys are hard nosed sharks. We love to hate this type of attorney but it’s also exactly the kind of representation we want on our side of the bargaining table! In a recent example Nancy Grace accused the mother of a missing child of holding back information. The mother committed suicide shortly after the hard hitting interview and the family partly blamed Grace. While Grace may have doggedly sought the truth, it’s unlikely that her decided lack of sympathy caused the woman’s death. The public was horrified at the behavior, and yet if you needed legal representation, would you want someone unsympathetic to the other side? Someone who would aggressively pursue justice on your behalf?

Richard A. Hall is founder and President/CEO of LexTech, Inc., a legal information consulting company. Mr. Hall has a unique breadth of experience which has enabled him to meld technology and sophisticated statistical analysis to produce a technology driven analytical model of the practice of law. As a busy civil trial attorney, he was responsible for the design and implementation of a LAN based litigation database and fully automated document production system for a mid-sized civil defense firm. He developed a task based billing model built on extensive statistical analysis of hundreds of litigated civil matters. In 1994, Mr. Hall invented linguistic modeling software which automatically reads, applies budget codes, budget codes and analyzes legal bill content. He also served as California Director and lecturer for a nationwide bar review. Mr. Hall continues to practice law and perform pro bono services for several Northern California judicial districts.

LexTech provides corporate and public sector legal managers a cohesive suite of tools, professional services, education.

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